5 Star Stable

Sharing a Christmas blog post has been on my agenda since Black Friday, but for the majority of the month I couldn't think of anything unique to write. I knew that the birth of the Savior in and of itself was fit to print, but I also wanted to share a message that wouldn't be lost in the monotony of ritualistic Christian gratitude. The commercialization of Christmas is overdone, as is a narrative of Christ's birth (Luke beat us all to the punch with that one). To be honest, I don't have any moving Christmas tales from my own life, so I am settling for a post about something I learned from my personal study of the Savior's life this year that I could apply to my own circumstances.

I have lost track of the number of times things haven't gone as I planned and in turn lead to much better results. I have gone through my own personal version of the pride cycle many a time.The Poppe Pride Perennial has been known to go through the following steps:

1. I create a meticulous plan that generally spans from the moment I pen it until approximately the end of eternity. 

2. Shortly thereafter, something doesn't go as I said it should.

3. I get frustrated and begin to believe that nothing will ever go right.

4. I pray and have a one sided rant session with Heavenly Father.

5. I feel guilty and repent for my lack of faith and slightly angry mental tone in step 4's prayer.

6. I decide to live life and see what happens now that things are going Heavenly Father's way and not my own.

7. I always come to find that Heavenly Father's plan allowed for my wishes as well as His.

8.1. I feel more guilt because I realize that I am happier than I would have been if my life followed my plan...

8.2...so I repent some more and add in a lengthy gratitude list.

9. I rededicate myself to trusting Heavenly Father and promise that I will never doubt His hand in my life again.

10. Repeat steps 1-9.

The largest examples of this have been when I moved to Minnesota in high school, went to BYU, and came on a mission. All were things I didn't want to do at the outset and turned out to be the biggest blessings in my life. As I have been serving a mission I have made it a goal to leave the field with 100% faith in Heavenly Father's plan for me. I have worked very hard to cut out steps 2-8.1 of the PPP and instead focus immediately on being grateful for the path my life has taken. A part of this growth cycle has included looking for the hand of Heavenly Father in other people's lives in the scriptures. This lead me to a unique observation while viewing a Nativity film this year.

As I watched Joseph lead a swollen and fatigued Mary through the crowded street of Bethlehem I started to day dream because the story was so familiar. Luckily I snapped back to attention as Joseph knocked on the door of an inn and was immediately shown the crowd of people and told that there was no room. For the first time in my life I found myself thinking that it was a blessing that they weren't admitted into an inn. I'm sure that delivering a child in a stable was not in Mary's birth plan, but it sure beat delivering the son of God in a rambunctious and over occupied hotel. How often do we think of the humble circumstances of the Lord's birth without associating it with the blessing it turned out to be for Mary and Joseph? They were able to privately absorb all that was happening to them. It isn't mentioned in scripture, but I imagine Mary's heart brimming with gratitude that her plan was exchanged for something better. No awkward onlookers, no Roman tax collectors, no nosy women trying to give unnecessary advice. Nothing. Nothing but two new parents, a host of angels, a handful of quiet livestock, and the spirit. It wasn't ideal, but it was exactly what the young couple needed to peacefully start their lives as the earthly caregivers of the first gift to humankind. It wasn't the Marriott, but Mary did deliver the Prince of Peace in a 5 star stable and that quiet delivery has given all of us the opportunity to return to our own 5 star mansions above.

Merry Christmas all! If you haven't already, explore this great Christmas website. 

Can I Speak to a Supervisor Please?

A little over a year ago I sold my old laptop on Ebay to a gentleman (and by gentleman I mean a good for nothing con artist) from South Africa.  Shortly after I paid the exorbitant international shipping fee I realized that the confirmation email I received from PayPal was false and that I had just been scammed out of a partially working Dell Inspiron laptop and 60 hard earned dollars.  I immediately began researching ways to rectify my situation.  In less than 24 hours I had called Ebay, attempted to track my package through the BYU shipping office AND the campus accounting office, emailed the US customs and border control department, the US embassy in South Africa, the South African customs and border control department, and local government officials and mail service providers in South Africa, and called the United States Postal Service package recovery hotline.  I was frustrated with myself for being naive enough to be scammed and was even more frustrated at the lack of voice I had.  I was trying everything within my power to recover my property while fighting the urge to become a victims of internet fraud vigilante. I would have given my younger brother's left arm to just recover the shipping fees I paid.  I hated the laptop I was selling and was honestly indifferent about that; I just wanted to be able to buy groceries that week.  Some punk in Nelson Mandela's homeland was reaping the benefit of my string cheese, flour tortilla, and Nutella money!

My hatred for bureaucratic red tape was heightened as a consequence of this debacle and I vowed to take down fraudulent Ebay accounts for good when I found myself in a position of governmental power one day.  I often wondered aloud why I didn't have a direct line to the UN. What good is the UN anyway if they can't help a normal global citizen out?  How often do humans demand to speak to a supervisor or someone in charge when something goes wrong?  All of the time.  But even then you're only likely to get a lower level teenage manager or the shift lead at your local Target.  You're never going to get to talk to the CEO about a problem you're facing or in my case, the leader of a country.

There is one situation in which you can communicate with the man at the top of a corporate hierarchy though; prayer.  Heavenly Father is the ultimate CEO, government official, family patriarch, and general leader of literally everything.  Why should I care that President Obama wouldn't answer my phone calls about my stolen property about to exit the US border when I was praying to someone much higher in the food chain than him?  I can assure you that there aren't any angelic interns that listen to our prayers and then forward the important ones onto Heavenly Father. He takes his own calls and offers every customer assistance.  I have seen the blessings of prayer in many different ways throughout my life.  One of which being the return of my computer quite a few months after I originally shipped it.  I have also felt the gratification of the supreme creator intently listening to every word I udder in gratitude, sorrow, frustration, and joy.  He never puts me on hold.  He never hires someone with a thick accent to talk me through solutions.  And he never discounts my opinions, fears, and stories as irrelevant.  He nods along, interjects, and fulfills his side of the bargain.  "Ask, and it shall be given unto you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.  For every one that asketh, receiveth; and he that seeketh, findeth; and to him that knocketh, it shall be opened." (3rd Nephi 14: 7-8)

It's My Blessing and I Want it Now!

A little over a year ago my younger brother proposed to his now wife.  This took place on the eve of my 22nd birthday month and 8th semester of college.  I was an unhealthy mixture of irate, depressed, confused, and bitter.  I often hid my desire to be married through the early years of college because I didn't want to be pegged as a girl who went to BYU to find a spouse and not to attain higher education, but I was starting to get nervous that my anti-marriage facade was the reason I had never found anyone.  The combination of my college career quickly ending and my younger brother popping the question before I had even ever seriously dated someone lead to a quarter-life crisis.  I was the oldest.  I was the only daughter.  I was the kid who was almost done with college.  I was the child that went to BYU.  I was the teenager who abstained from everything and strictly adhered to curfew.  I was the good example.  I was the Poppe child who deserved to be planning a wedding and a future.  I. I. I. My life quickly became a J.G. Wentworth commercial where instead of "It's my money and I want it now," the thought, "It's my blessing and I want it now!" often circulated through my inner-dialogue.  My attitude about my brother's upcoming nuptials was so sour that I couldn't even find a small space in my heart to be happy for him.  One day I was studying trials and read Jeffrey R. Holland's talk, The Laborers in the Vineyard, and was immediately chastised when I read, "We are not diminished when someone else is added upon."

My brother was getting married to a wonderful young woman and I had spent months being bitter because he found happiness before I did.  I knew the trials he had gone through in life and the struggles he had and saw those as making him unworthy of the one blessing I wanted but wasn't receiving.  I failed to notice that getting married was a blessing, but more importantly it was the motivation my brother needed to come back into the fold.  While a spouse was something that sounded nice to me, it was much more to my brother.  It was a symbol of repentance and the mercy of God.  He found someone to grow with.  We don't always know why things happen in life.  I don't know why I'm almost 23, single, and on a mission while my brother never served one and was married shortly after he turned 20.  I do know that he being blessed with a beautiful wife doesn't diminish me in any way because "the worth of souls is great in the sight of God (D&C 18:10)".  Marriage didn't make my brother any better than me because we are both equal children of the same Heavenly Father (well, and the same earthly father).

How often do we compare our blessings with others and dwell on how Heavenly Father put one more shiny toy in someone else's basket than our own?  Haven't we all received the most important blessing in the form of Jesus Christ?  All the other blessings we receive are just trifles compared to the salvation offered to us through the faithful sacrifice of God's Only Begotten.  All the other gifts we receive are just stocking stuffers compared to the real present, the Atonement of Christ, under the tree. 

June 8, 2013.  My brother, Bryce, and I with Brandon and my beautiful sister-in-law, Brianna.